The TempestXtreme Talk Show
by TempestXtreme
Summary: BWAHAH!!! Read, review and be afraid!! Oh, and the PG is for Xellos *shudders*
1. Default Chapter

**The TempestXtreme Talk show!**

**By TempestXtreme**

A/N: Yeah, yeah I know that this has been done to death, but I just can't help myself! ^_^

Rebecca (the sexy announcer and the host's wife and powerful sorceress): * walks on stage* 

Suicidal guy in audience: Oh yeah! WHOO HOO BABY!! * gets vaporised by a Flare spell*

Rebecca: * clears her throat* Tempest! You didn't have to do that!

Tempest: But he was ogling you! Only I'm allowed to do that!! -_-

Rebecca: Oh dear goddess… Anyway! Welcome to the TempestXtreme Talk show! Here's your host: Tempest!

Audience: *nervous applause and a…* HURRAY!

Tempest: Thank you, my beautiful *cough-and-sexy-cough* wife Rebecca! For our first guest, from FF8, Irvine Kinneas!

Irvine: *walks on stage, takes off his hat, bows and ends up looking at Rebecca's butt* Hmmm…not a bad view ^_^

Rebecca: STOP STARING AT MY BUTT!! *fireballs Irvine*

The Audience (well, all of the males with girlfriends): YAY!! 

Tempest: *helps Irvine up and puts him in the chair…headfirst* Welcome to my show! *under his breath* And if you EVER stare at my wife like that again I'll toss you to Barney, understood?

Irvine: O.o *frantic nod and nervous smile*

Tempest: Good! Now for my first question: is it true that you hit on anything that's wearing a skirt?

Irvine: Well…yeah!

Tempest: Even if what's wearing a skirt isn't necessarily female…or human?

Irvine: *warily* Well…

Rebecca: Uh oh.

Tempest: * grins evilly* If you would look at the screen behind you, you'll see Mr. Kinneas hitting on a woman in a short skirt! Well, at least he thought it was a woman!

Irvine (on the screen): Hey baby what's your sign?

Woman in skirt (on the screen): Sore wa himitsu desu!

Irvine (on the screen and on the stage): 

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *faints both on screen and on stage*

Tempest: * is now laughing too hard to speak*

Rebecca: O.o OK! WHO LET MY HUSBAND NEAR THE COFFE MACHINE?!

Voice from backstage: Sore was himitsu desu!

Rebecca: ARGH!! XELLOS!! *sends a life-size mechanic doll in Xellos' direction. Seconds later the Mazoku's scream of complete and utter horror can be heard from backstage*

The Audience: O.O ?!?!?!?!?

Rebecca: Uh, we'll be back after this commercial break to talk to… * re-reads the prompt card* ULTIMECIA?!! O.o *as the screen fades* TEMPEST! I WANT TO TALK TO YOU!! 

COMMERCIAL #1:

Announcer: Are you sad and lonely? Do you long for female company? Then call us here! We'll hire out Rebecca Angelheart to you for the day! Just call 1-800-- *gets cut off by the twenty bus-sized fireballs that fry him to a crisp and by the Dragon Slave that follows the fireball barrage* X_X

Rebecca: I AM NOT FOR HIRE YOU BLOODY PERVERT!!

AND NOW BACK TO OUR SHOW!!

Tempest: Hello again! Our next guest WAS going to be Ultimecia, but she was unable to attend due to extreme circumstances… 

*The scene switches to the parking lot, where Ultimecia can be seen running from an enraged Rebecca who is swinging her enchanted sword like a madwoman*

Rebecca: YOU GAVE US SORCERESSES A BAD NAME YOU BITCH!! 

Ultimecia: SAVE ME!!! * is hit in the back by twenty fireballs and a Giga Slave* X_X

*The scene changes back to a nervous Tempest, who seems to be avoiding his enraged wife as he searches for another guest*

Tempest: AHA!! *picks up the phone* Hello? Miyu? Can you come to my show now? Yes, yes, I know that we were supposed to be interviewing Ultimecia, but Rebecca blew her up with twenty fireballs and a Giga Slave, so we don't have anybody to interview. You can come? Thank you! *puts the phone down* Phew! Saved the show!

Rebecca: *has no idea that the camera is on her and is glaring at a male audience member. The poor man is trying in vain to get away from the pissed off sorceress and then points at the camera. Rebecca looks at the lens and simply fireballs it* WARN ME NEXT TIME!! 

Camera guy: O.o This job is dangerous!!

Tempest: It's your fault for not taking that insurance policy you know.

Camera guy: *isn't too bright* Oh shut up Chicken boy.

Tempest: *grabs the poor man and tosses him to Xellos* I AM NOT A CHICKEN BOY!!

Xellos: *looks at the petrified camera guy* Why hello there ^_^

Camera Guy: AAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Tempest: We'll be right back after this commercial… *as the screen fades to black, screams of horror can be heard from a certain camera guy* 

COMMERCIAL#2:

Announcer: Are you bored? Do you need entertainment in your life? Well, don't watch THIS show! It's crazy! *gets stepped on by a huge Gundam* 

Tempest: SHADDUP!!

AND NOW BACK TO OUR SHOW!

Rebecca: *is calm again after 50 cups of coffee* Our next guest is the Vampire Princess, Miyu, and her servant Larva! 

Miyu: *appears out of nowhere and sits down. Larva merely stands to the side staring into nothingness*

Tempest: Welcome to my show Miyu! 

Miyu: I am happy to be here. There are a lot of potential immortal meals here.

The Audience: O.o 

Rebecca: *chuckles evilly*

Tempest: Uh, Miyu…you can't eat the audience.

Miyu: That's too bad.

Larva: …

Tempest: Oh shut up you one-eyed freak.

Larva: ?!

Rebecca: *stifles a chuckle*

Tempest: So Miyu! Tell me about your job.

Miyu: Do you mean the hunting of the demon gods?

Tempest: Yes. 

Miyu: Well you see, when I refused my fate, many demon gods escaped from the Abyss, and until I hunt them all I'll be eternally young and my parents will always be locked up in time.

Tempest: Wait, you'll be young forever as long as there are demon gods around? And if you hunt them all you'll grow old and die? WHAT ARE YOU, STUPID?!?! 

Miyu: *blinks* What?

Tempest: You'll be immortal as long as there is at least ONE demon god in this world! What, you didn't figure that out??

Miyu: I never thought of it that way. But my parents…

Rebecca: Oh, screw your parents. Your dad was immortal and your mother was a vampire. 

Miyu: Huh? So what are you getting at?

Rebecca: You'll live forever if you just leave those demon gods alone!

Miyu: Right… Tempest your wife's a lunatic.

Tempest: I noticed, trust me. *ducks a fireball* What? *smiles innocently*

Rebecca: Well, that's the end of our first show! Tune in next time for another episode of the TempestXtreme Talk Show! See you then!

Audience: *claps only because Rebecca is holding a huge meteor in the air with her magic and has threatened to crush them all if they don't clap*

Author's notes: What did you think?? Should I do another one??? Tell me in your reviews!!


	2. Episode 2

The TempestXtreme Talk Show – Episode Two: Selphie's revenge! By TempestXtreme 

Rebecca: Hello and welcome to another episode of the TempestXtreme Talk show!

Audience: *clap frantically because Tempest has a large cannon and is preparing to use it…on them*

Rebecca: TEMPEST!! 

Tempest: Huh? What? Oh, we're on the air? *puts away the cannon, much to the relief of the audience* Today's first guest: Selphie Tilmitt from FF8! 

Selphie: *half-skips, half-hops onto the stage* Heey! Stormy! Hi!

Tempest: I've asked you not to call me that -_-

Suicidal guy in audience: "STORMY"?!? BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! *gets fried by multiple fireballs*

Rebecca: Tempest…

Tempest: I know, I know… I'm not supposed to fry the audience. 

Rebecca: No…the fireballs were too small ^_^ They should have been this size! *fries the same man with multiple bus-sized fireballs*

Selphie: O.o 

Tempest: Hmm…yes, those fireballs were bigger! Now, Selphie, your boyfriend is Irvine Kinneas, correct?

Selphie: What? Irvine? My boyfriend? NO! Xel is my boyfriend!

Xellos: *'ports in from backstage* Selphie! ^_^

Selphie: Xelly-poo! ^___^ *glomps Xellos*

Tempest, Rebecca and the audience: O.o

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

Selphie and Xellos: ^_____________^

Rebecca: *snaps* FIIIIIIIIIREEEEEEEEEEEEEEBALLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!! *sends a double-deck-bus-sized fireball at them and blows them through the roof* THAT was the single most disturbing thing I have ever had the misfortune of seeing!

Tempest:  *is catatonic* O.o

Rebecca: Uh, we'll be back after these commercial breaks… 

COMMERCIAL#1:

Announcer: Well, Christmas is coming folks, and y'all know what that means! Yes! FRUITCAKE! Order our fruitcake today; it's fruit-a-licious! *takes a bite out of the fruitcake* What's this stuff made from anyway?

Xellos: Sore wa himitsu desu!

Announcer: O.O AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! I'VE BEEN POISONED!!

COMMERCIAL#2:

Squall: Whatever.

Uh…back to our show, I guess… 

Rebecca: And welcome back! I'm your hostess, Rebecca Angelheart! Tempest was, uh, indisposed! 

Tempest: *can be seen hyperventilating after finding Xellos and Selphie skinny-dipping*

Rebecca: * a little TOO eagerly* Our next guest is somebody who looks up to me and worships the ground I walk on –

Guy in Audience: YEAH RIGHT! AAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!! *gets zapped by 50 bolts of lightning*

Rebecca: As I was saying… Our next guest is…ULTIMECIA?! AAAAAARRRRGGGGGGHH!!

Ultimecia: *appears out of nowhere and sits down* I am happy to be on the show. I will now steal your powers and--- *gets cut off by the large meteor that rams into her, crushing her between the stage and the meteor*

Rebecca: I hate that woman -_- 

Voice: Uh, hello? Am I too late?

Rebecca: Ah good! You're here! Ladies and gentleman, allow me to introduce to you, from the world Thimballen, Gwendolyn.

Gwendolyn: *is a pretty woman with long blonde hair and blue eyes wearing a blue dress* It's a pleasure to be here, Rebecca.

Rebecca: It's a pleasure to have you here, Gwen. How go the dead?

Gwendolyn: Well, a spirit told me the other day that your husband will—

Tempest: REBECCA! WHY ARE YOU HIDING PEANUTS IN THE ARM OF MY GUNDAM?!

Gwendolyn: --never mind. I was going to say that he found your secret stash of chocolate-covered peanuts ^_^

Rebecca: Uh…hehehe…. So! Gwen, why did you hardly appear sane in the Darksword Trilogy?

Gwen: What are you talking about? I appeared in quite a few chapters of the last two books sane. I was sane when I met Joram and I was sane when I walked into the Beyond—

Tempest: --but you were insane when you came out and started talking to the dead. Only in the last two chapters of the last book were you sane!

Gwen: -_- I hate you both. *literally disappears into thin air*

Rebecca and Tempest: *grin smugly*

Tempest: And now for another commercial break!

COMMERCIAL#3:

Announcer: I am not doing this commercial. It will get me fireballed many, many times. *gets Dragon Slaved*

Rebecca: Was that better?

Announcer: @_@ Never mind…

BACK TO OUR SHOW!

Tempest: Welcome back to the show! Our last guest for today is Zidane Tribal from the planet Gaia in FF9!

Zidane: *walks on stage and eyes Rebecca* Hmm…sexy queen…

Tempest; If you so much as look at my wife again I will rip that tail off and shove it up your ass and then down your throat many, many times -_-

Zidane: O.o *frantic nod*

Tempest: Good ^_^ So Zidane, is Kuja really gay?

Zidane: Why are you asking me? I didn't have a threesome with Kuja and…uh oh… Uh… 

Tempest:  BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!

Zidane: O.o I'm outta here! *runs out*

Rebecca: …That ends today's show, I guess…

A/N: Do ya want more?? 


	3. Episode 3

**The TempestXtreme Talk Show – Pokemon Vs. Digimon – PART ONE**

By TempestXtreme 

Rebecca: *is wearing a tight red dress that has all the males ogling her* Hello and welcome back to the TempestXtreme Talk Show! Here's your host, Tempest! 

Tempest: *is preparing to blast the audience with a Giga Slave spell, but decides to run the show for now* Yes! Welcome back to my show *glares at an audience member who was about to open his mouth* Today we have a special event happening: Pokemon Vs. Digimon!

Audience: O.O ?!?!

Rebecca: See, I TOLD you that this week's show would stun them into silence!

Tempest: Yeah, yeah… 

Rebecca: *grins smugly*

Tempest: We'll be back after this commercial break.

COMMERCIAL #1

Announcer: Are… *doesn't get the chance to finish as a man-eating sausage-dog eats him* 

Man-eating sausage dog: URP!! ^_^

BACK TO THE SHOW

Tempest: *looks up sharply from where he was smooching Rebecca* Uh, welcome back! *under his breath to the stage manager* Why didn't you tell me we were on air??

Stage Manager: Sore wa himitsu desu!

Tempest: O.o  Uh, anyway, back to our show… Ahem! Our first guest: Pikachu!

Pikachu: Pika! Pika-pi!

Xellos: *sees Pikachu and screams* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Tempest: And our second guest, from Digimon: Gatomon!

Gatomon: Hello there!

Tempest: Greetings, Gatomon. Glad to have you on the show…O.o

Gatomon: *has now skinned Pikachu and is devouring it* Glad to be here! ^_^

Tempest: Great, she just ATE our first guest -_-

Blackwargreymon: *from backstage* You make that sound like it's a bad thing!

Gatomon: That voice sounded familiar… But he's dead.

Tempest: *snickers* Introducing our second and third guests, Lashana Inferno and Blackwargreymon!

Gatomon: *does a double-take at the sound of the Mega-Digimon's name* O.o

Lashana: Well at least Xellos isn't around.

Xellos: Hello, Lashana-chan!

Blackwargreymon: *INTO a microphone* DON'T CALL HER 'CHAN'! *blinks as the entire studio suddenly shakes* Oops…

Everybody except Blackwargreymon: @_@

Tempest: Right, now that I've lost 65% of my hearing… So Lashana! How've you been? ^_^

Lashana: * after glaring at her Bonded* Fine, and yourself?

Tempest: Great! I got my own show, and it's a hit! ^_^ Right, audience?

Audience: *clap wildly because Rebecca is once again causing a massive meteor to hover dangerously above them*

Blackwargreymon: O.o And I thought that the David Show was odd…

Gatomon: Why are you still alive, Blackwargreymon??

Blackwargreymon: Hey! It's Gatomon! Where's that brat friend of yours?

Gatomon: Her name is Kari! And she's at home watching this.

MEANWHILE – IN TAI AND KARI'S HOUSE

Kari: O.o BLACKWARGREYMON IS ALIVE?!?! I have to tell the others!

BACK IN THE STUDIO

Lashana: Why did you invite me here?

Tempest: You're Bonded to a Digimon, and today's show centres around Digimon and Pokemon. Gatomon already ate Pikachu.

Lashana: And that's a bad thing?

Blackwargreymon: That's what I said. 

Tempest; Right…

The wall suddenly gets blasted inwards and Imperialdramon and Wargreymon are standing in the hole.

Wargreymon: Gatomon! Kari is out back! We'll take care of Blackwargreymon!

Blackwargreymon: Oh not again!

Tempest: * backs away from Lashana as an aura of power swirls around her* Uh oh.

TO BE CONTINUED


	4. Episode 4

The TempestXtreme Talk Show – Pokemon Vs. Digimon Part Two 

**By TempestXtreme**

(When we last left these wackos, Lashana was pissed off and Blackwargreymon was wondering why he was being attacked by two other Mega-Digimon. Tempest had backed off from Lashana due to the fact that the Sorceress had an aura of power around her…)

Imperialdramon: You should be dead!

Wargreymon: Yes! Your very existence is a threat!

Blackwargreymon: *raises his hand to his forehead in an exasperated smack* Oh dear gods…this is getting ridicules! Right, Lashana… Uh oh

Lashana: *is now glowing with a strong aura of rage* LEAVE MY BONDED ALONE!! FIREBALL! FIREBALL! FIREBALL!!

Imperialdramon: *is struck by three full-power fireballs* @_@

Wargreymon: Imperialdramon! That does it! You'll pay for that, you…!

Blackwargreymon: *growls* If you touch my Bonded I will rip your arms off!

Wargreymon: _TERRA FORCE! _* tosses a full power attack, misses Blackwargreymon and Lashana, an…*

Voice: Merde! @_@

A heavy silence falls over the studio, and then…

Telca: BLACKY YOU ARE SO DEAD!!

Everyone: *cover their ears* @_@

Tempest: *quickly* It was Wargreymon! He did it!

Telca: * storms on stage and glares at Wargreymon with Amber eyes promising death* I'LL TEACH YOU TO HURT MY REMY! FIREBALL!!

Wargreymon: *is crisp-a-fied* X_X

 Imperialdramon: Wargreymon! Why you little!

Blackwargreymon: *tackles Imperialdramon and their fight is lost in a dust cloud*

Tempest: * watches as the studio is wrecked by the fight, and finally snaps* **_STOP IT!!!!_**

****

Blackwargreymon and Imperialdramon: *stop and stare at the enraged Arch-Angel*

Tempest: *snarls as he take on his Omega-Arch-Angel form and flies up to Imperialdramon. He glares at the Mega Digimon before slamming his fists into his head, stunning him. He then flies down behind him, grabs his tail and, without so much as a grunt, tosses him with all of his strength into the side of Dracos Mountain* 

Rebecca: Uh…right. Well, that's all for today's show. Tune in next week, same time, same place, and same channel!

As the screen fades to black, a loud roar can be heard followed by a crash.

Tempest: SHAKAREI YOU IDIOTIC DRAGON! DON'T BLOW UP MY STUDIO JUST BECAUSE IMPERIALDRAMON SMASHED YOUR CAVE!!!

Shakarei: **_YOU THREW HIM THERE!!_**

****

Rebecca and Lashana: Oh dear gods…


	5. Episode 5!

**The TempestXtreme Talk Show!**

**By TempestXtreme**

The show opens to show Tempest chasing Goku (from Dragon Ball Z) around with a large hammer. 

Tempest: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! Come back here, you Saiyan wuss! BWAHAHAHAH!!* swings the hammer downwards and knocks out the Saiyan and breaking the hammer* 

Rebecca: *SD's and turns to the audience* Welcome to the TempestXtreme Talk Show! Today, we talk to the villains from various video games and TV shows! 

Tempest: BWAHAHAHAHAH!!! *beans a cameraman with a baseball bat* Our first guest, Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer!

Spike: *runs onto the stage in order to escape an enraged Lashana and her deadly fireballs* Uh, hi,

Lashana: *from backstage* I'LL GET YOU FOR TRYING TO BITE ME YOU STUPID BLOODY VAMPIRE!!

Spike: Suck my---!

Eve: *beans the vampire on the head with a sledgehammer* Watch your language!

Spike: *glares at Eve, then pales when he sees that Rebecca is casually juggling three fireballs* Uh… It's nice to be here…

Tempest: *is currently insane* So Spike! Tell me about your ears!

Spike: O.o My ears?! Why the bloody hell do you want to know about my ears?!

Tempest: Then how about your fangs? ^_^

Spike: O.o 

Tempest: * starts to dance around the stage* Spiky's got big teeth! Spiky's got big teeth!

Spike: What bloody hell is wrong with him?! O.o

*Backstage* 

Lashana: Telca, what's wrong with Tempest?

Telca: He's male.

Lashana: True, but that doesn't really explain why he's dancing around singing, "Spiky's got big ears," over and over again.

Telca: Did I mention the fact that he's male?

Lashana: *sighs* 

*Onstage*

Tempest: *is doing the Tango with Rebecca and grinning like an idiot* ^_^

Rebecca: *is seriously wondering if her husband has finally lost his mind*

Spike: *is doing the stupid thing and hitting on Eve* So, you wanna go out sometime?

Eve: *calmly grabs the vampire and punts him into the wall, rendering him unconscious* No!

*****Backstage*

Lashana: That's it! Tempest has finally lost his mind!

Telca: *is busy recording the entire scene on a camcorder* This is getting good! ^_^

*****Onstage*

Eve: Uh…due to my father's sudden bout of insanity, I'll be taking over the show…

Males in Audience: WHOO HOO!! YEAH BABY!!!!!!! *they all get Kah-Meha-Meha-ed by a highly annoyed Eve* @_@

Eve: Now, from Final Fantasy 7, the villain, Sephiroth!

Audience: @_@

Sephiroth: *comes on stage and sits down* You will all be my servants! I will become one with the Planet and be a god!

Eve: *raises an eyebrow* Right… LASHANA! TELCA!!

Lashana and Telca: *walk on stage* What?

Eve: I got you a new test subject for your 'experiments' ^_^

Lashana and Telca: *cackle evilly and drag the poor villain away. Moments later he can be heard screaming as he is force-fed a Mazoku brand of chocolate, while at the same time being forced to watch videos of Xellos belly dancing on a constant loop*

Eve: For our final guest, Kuja from Final Fantasy 9!

Kuja: *walks on stage and sits down prettily* Hi! 

Eve: Uh, hi. Kuja, can you tell us if it is true that you had a crush on the Eidolon Bahamut?

Kuja: Oh yes! I also had a crush on my brother Zidane, and that ugly elephant lady Queen Brahne turned me on!

Eve: *shudders and pulls a baseball bat out of nowhere* SICKO!! *starts to chase Kuja around the studio, smacking him over the head with the baseball bat until it breaks. Then she Dragon Slaves him for good measure* Well, that's all for tonight folks! Join us next week for another episode of the TempestXtreme Talk Show!

As the screen fades you can see Tempest chasing a bikini-clad Rebecca around the stage, grinning madly.

Tempest: Get back here you foxy lady! *purrs*


	6. Episode 6

The TempestXtreme Talk Show – Episode 6: ^____^ 

**By TempestXtreme**

As the show starts, Telca can be seen chasing Wargreymon around with a hot glue gun and a can of silly string.

Telca: GET BACK HERE!!

Wargreymon: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Rebecca: *glances over to Telca* Welcome to another episode of the TempestXtreme Talk Show! Here's your host, Eve!

Guy in Audience: Where's Tempest?

TRIVADIA NATIONAL INSANE ASSYLUM –

Tempest: *can be seen grinning idiotically in a straight jacket* ^___________^

BACK AT THE SHOW –

Eve: Welcome, welcome! Today we're interviewing the Power Puff Girls!

Blossom, Bubbles and Buttercup: Hi! ^_^

Eve: Welcome to our show! So tell me, how old are you, really?

Blossom: Uh…4…

Eve: And you fly around fighting crime?? 

Buttercup: Yeah! We fly around and kick butt!

Bubbles: Yeah, because we're the Power Puff Girls!

Telca: *from where she's torturing Wargreymon* YEAH RIGHT! MORE LIKE THE POWDER PUFFY GIRLS!!

Blossom: What did you say?!

Telca: YOU HEARD ME!!

Buttercup: Let's get her!

They fly off to pummel Telca…and seconds later they're tied up, gagged and are being forced to watch Xellos do his striptease with Selphie.

Eve: *shudders* That was evil, Telca.

Telca: Thanks! ^_^

Eve: O.o Right… Well, after the break, we'll be interviewing Rinoa Heartilly from FF8!

COMMERCIAL#1:

Announcer: Are you bored out of your mind? Do you want a little excitement in your life? Then call today and rent out Lashana for a day! Yes, you can -- *gets cut off when he's blasted by a full power 'Terra Destroyer'*

Blackwargreymon: YOU ARE NOT HIRING OUT MY BONDED!!

Lashana: That's right! *fireballs the announcer*

BACK TO OUR SHOW!

Rinoa: *sits down in a chair* Hi! I'm happy to be on your show, Eve!

Rebecca: *under her breath* SURE you are! You just want to try and upstage me.

Eve: It's nice to have you here, Rinoa! So tell me, are you and Squall ever going to get married?

Rinoa: Me? Marry Squall? No!

Eve: Uh…then whom are you going to marry?

Rinoa: *grins and glomps Xellos, who just happened to be stripping nearby* Xelly-poo!

Xellos: ^___________^

Telca: ACCCCCCCCCCK!! *fireballs the both of them at the exact same time as Rebecca does, the resulting explosion sending them both through the roof* That girl needs help…

Rebecca: You want to know what the scary part is?

Telca: What?

Rebecca: Rinoa's a Sorceress like us.

Telca: Oh great, a Sorceress who loves Xellos -_- That's all we need.

Selphie: * runs onstage in a wet t-shirt and a g-string* Where's my Xelly-poo?

Telca, Rebecca and Eve: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!! 

Male Audience Members: ^___________________^

Rebecca: Telca, you and I will blast Selphie. Eve, take care of the male audience members.

Eve: Right.

Rebecca and Telca: *send four full-power fireballs at Selphie, sending her through the same hole as Rinoa and Xellos* 

Telca: Rebecca?

Rebecca: Yes?

Telca: Your dimension is really bizarre.

Rebecca: I'm not the one who has a fruitcake as a Harem member.

Telca: Point.

Eve: *freezes the entire audience* There! ^_^

Rebecca: When we come back, we'll be interviewing a mystery guest! Stay tuned!

COMMERCIAL#2:

Announcer: *is screaming too loudly at the sight of leather-clad Xellos to say anything* 

BACK TO OUR SHOW!!

Eve: Welcome back! Now, we're interviewing a mystery guest! 

Mystery Guest: *walks on stage wearing a hooded-cloak with the hood shadowing his face so that you cannot see who it is* Hello there. I am pleased to be here.

Eve: Tell me, what do you do for a living?

Mystery Guest: I host a talk show.

Eve: Really? What's it called?

Mystery Guest: * throws off his hood to reveal…Tempest!* The TempestXtreme Talk Show! A show of insane proportions! ^_^ I'm baaaaaack!

Eve: AAAACK! DON'T DO THAT AGAIN!! *beans her father over the head with a baseball bat, frowning when the baseball bat breaks*

Tempest: ^_^ Well, that's all for today! Tune in next week for another insane episode of the TempestXtreme Talk Show! 

Power Puff Girls and Wargreymon: *have all fainted from having to watch a looped video of Xellos strip teasing* @_@


End file.
